Relaxing, and getting things done...
Apr. 4th, 2004 06:15 pm![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
kellan_the_tabbyWhile the title sounds like a pretty good thing, what I've been thinking about is not so much good.
Today is hypothetically a day off, so Lewis and I have mostly been hanging out, playing with computers, reading and being only intermittently useful. Lewis even cooked breakfast.
I'm discovering something, though. While I'm sitting here messing around, I'm either trying to figure out what else I should be doing or...feeling like I'm 'getting stuff done', and not in a good way. I've been reading a series of short stories and, while I've been enjoying them quite a bit, there's also a feeling at the end of it that I'd 'gotten done' something that I 'had to do'.
It makes it harder to enjoy relaxing when I still feel like I'm working.
Went down to rummage around in the fridge, and the leftovers were all 'something else I have to either eat or throw out' instead of 'cool easy food I like and don't have to do anything to'.
When I pick up a new book of my 'stuff to read' pile, there's this vague pleased feeling that once I'm done reading it it'll be one less Thing To Do...
Am I going nuts? Is this making any sense? It makes sense in my head but reading back over this, I'm not sure I'm putting it in words that make sense...
I need to remember how to _loaf_ instead of just relaxing enough to have the energy for the next thing I have to do.
*sigh*
Today is hypothetically a day off, so Lewis and I have mostly been hanging out, playing with computers, reading and being only intermittently useful. Lewis even cooked breakfast.
I'm discovering something, though. While I'm sitting here messing around, I'm either trying to figure out what else I should be doing or...feeling like I'm 'getting stuff done', and not in a good way. I've been reading a series of short stories and, while I've been enjoying them quite a bit, there's also a feeling at the end of it that I'd 'gotten done' something that I 'had to do'.
It makes it harder to enjoy relaxing when I still feel like I'm working.
Went down to rummage around in the fridge, and the leftovers were all 'something else I have to either eat or throw out' instead of 'cool easy food I like and don't have to do anything to'.
When I pick up a new book of my 'stuff to read' pile, there's this vague pleased feeling that once I'm done reading it it'll be one less Thing To Do...
Am I going nuts? Is this making any sense? It makes sense in my head but reading back over this, I'm not sure I'm putting it in words that make sense...
I need to remember how to _loaf_ instead of just relaxing enough to have the energy for the next thing I have to do.
*sigh*
![[identity profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/openid.png){kind=small}
no subject
Date: 2004-04-04 03:49 pm (UTC)What to do about it, though... Hell if I know! I think it kinda has to be a decisive shift in perceptions, but that's always easier said than done. *hugs* Good luck with it.
no subject
Date: 2004-04-04 05:30 pm (UTC)As it turns out, the simple presence of friends in the house seems to temporarily alleviate the problem. Guess we get to invite people over more often...truly a horrible thought.
Probably wise, especially as they also keep offering to help us with heraldry...
no subject
Date: 2004-04-05 04:28 am (UTC)