speaking the truth

[ Remy, a big black dog with white toes, is standing behind a slightly gnawed on cardboard box. His tail is caught mid-wag, and his head is lowered, ears perked forward, sniffing furiously at the top of the box. ]

We try to recycle cardboard, & much of it does make it to the recycle place in town, especially the stuff that’s been broken down inside the house & stuffed into another cardboard box.

But walking past Remy with a single cardboard box in hand? Especially when it’s a nice big one?

… yeah, that doesn’t happen so much.

[ Remy has knocked the box over. One white-toed forepaw rests atop it, holding it in place; he’s delicately tearing off some of the packing tape it’s been wrapped in. His ears and tail are doing basically the same thing. ]

He just gets SO EXCITED.

He often starts by carefully peeling off the parts of the cardboard with tape on them & spitting them off to the side, which is HILARIOUS & also somewhat of a relief.

[ He’s moved to the bottom of the box. One forepaw is still bracing it in place, but the opposite one from before. His teeth are sunk into the bottom edge of the box and he is staring directly into the camera. ]

But then it’s time for murder. He _is_ still a puppy, after all.

[ The box has been stood on and is bent in a variety of ways. Remy’s standing on a lip flap with one forepaw, and has shoved his head into where the side of the box facing up is folded. ]

& when it’s time for murder, he goes at it with his full heart & body, using teeth, claws, body weight, & his head.

No, not for thinking, for headbutting the box into submission.

[ He’s now addressing the box from the bottom, both forepaws squishing it down, head pressing the folded bit down further. He’s visibly having a delightful time. ]

He _is_ a very intelligent dog (frighteningly so, at times) but man, there’s limits. & when there’s a box to murder? That’s over the limit.

originally posted on Patreon; support me over there to see posts a week early!

[ Remy, a big black dog with a white stripe down his belly and white toes, is standing outside in the middle of an expanse of firmly-trodden dirt, staring with great interest at the camera. His ears are perked forward, and his tail is wagging. ]

I went outside to get cool frost-on-plants pics, but then there was a Remy, so.

He was like WHATCHA DOIN & also LOVE & I DID go over to pet him but also I took pictures first, so he had a couple opinions about that.

[ Remy’s standing at the corner of the house, forepaws up on a rock, staring intently off to the right at the front door. ]

HEY is PAPA COMING? Where’s Papa? Where’s PAPA? Why aren’t you PETTING ME?

[ Remy’s back about where he was standing before, forepaws delicately placed just behind another rock. It’s really too small for him to stand on, alas. ]

WHAT’S over THERE? Is there a CAR COMING? I think there’s a BIRD. Also you COULD be petting me. Or you could throw my rope toy! ROPE TOY ROPE TOY ROPE TOY

[ He’s staring straight at the camera again. A line of dried dog slobber is visible, crossing his muzzle from left to right, about an inch back from his nose. Look, it’s just like this here. ]

Petting? Rope toy? Broom? You could throw my broom! LOVE I NEED LOVE

why YES I petted him. You don’t leave a love emergency untreated. Then, of course, the rope toy.

Eventually I was allowed to leave, but it sure took a while.

originally posted on Patreon; support me over there to see posts a week early!

[ Remy, a big black dog with a white chest, is flopped in his crate, which is in the van. He’s wearing a blue halter and looking very alert. ]

Or not, because despite being approximately a quarter lab, Remy DOES NOT LIKE water.

But we were at Fountain Creek, & I wanted to look for creek glass, & Remy was bored, & it was too snowy & muddy for Loiosh (who was BIG MAD but wound up napping about it), so I stuck a leash on Remy & off we went.

They’ve done a lot of work on Fountain Creek in the last several years to help deal with flooding, & maybe half of that is still there (the rest got flooded away), so my usual haunts had gotten VERY rearranged. Add to that the part where, while I don’t mind walking in snow, it’s hard to find creek glass that way, there was really only one place I could get to, & even that spot was tricky.

Remy got his paws wet & also learned that the ground is not always the ground, by which I mean that sometimes trying to stand on snow can be tricky. Plus, you know, running water, & he was definitely at least unnerved. But he was also having a good time, so onward we went.

& finally got to a nice gravel bank, maybe fifty feet wide and a couple hundred feet long, just barely above water level, the perfect spot to find creek glass.

& the first piece I found? Rare blue, an EXCELLENT omen.

I showed it to Remy, so he knew what we were looking for. He tried to eat it.

He also found trash & tried to eat that, but I’m quick. (No I’m not, I took pictures & then hauled him away, I’m just glad he wanted to sniff it good first.)

[ Remy’s standing on a gravel-scattered mud bank, sniffing carefully at what might have once been an orange juice carton. That’s a guess. ]

Some of the time he was VERY EXCITE, smelling everything, pricking ears at birds and cars and the wind and the water, & generally having a LOVELY time.

[ Remy’s staring off into the distance. The distance consists of a broad, shallow creek, more mudflats, and, on the horizon, trees. ]

But several times he got kinda freaked out, & needed reassurance. He is easily reassured by shoving himself up against a human & getting squished. So I squished him. He made it easy.

[ Remy butt, seen from above. The blur across the bottom of the pic is my belly, because he shoved himself between my legs so I could squish him. ]

He made it easy enough that I could squish him AND take pictures, which is the best way for this kind of thing to go.

No pics of the way back to the van, because I was exhausted & it was through, like, a foot of snow. But Remy learned how much fun it is dancing through a foot of VERY fluffy snow! & then he was very tired & we all had a nap.

originally posted on Patreon; support me over there to see posts a week early!

[ Remy, a big black dog with a white belly and white toes, sits in his crate, staring eagerly at a cardboard box that’s in the foreground of the photo. ]

There’s of course a lot of preparation necessary for Remy to get a Box of Tasty Destruction, & it all happens right there, so by the time the thing is actually ready he’s usually VERY EAGER to get it RIGHT NOW. As witness.

[ Remy’s sitting in the same spot, but one massive paw is up on the crate wall, blurry, because he’s using it to gently insinuate that perhaps I could put the Box of Tasty Destruction inside the crate with him instead of making him wait while I get pictures. ]

Then, destruction.

[ Remy’s got the box in his mouth. It’s sitting on the floor, and the top of his head is towards the camera; both ears are sticking all the way out with the vigor of his chewing. ]

Methodical destruction, though. He can’t just tear into the box, he’s got to figure out the fastest way to get the egg carton out. It’s a Process.

[ The egg crate is sticking a couple inches out of the box, which is plenty enough for Remy to start taking it apart and licking off the contents. In this picture, though, he’s in the middle of tearing off a piece of the carton; his muzzle is all wrinkled up, and he looks very fierce. ]

& then, having gotten the egg crate at least a little bit out, it’s Peanut Butter Kibble Time.

[ The egg carton is about halfway out of the box, and one corner is held open by his muzzle; just a single kibble is visible therein. ]

Success! (Further success?)

[ Remy’s got half his face shoved in the egg carton now. I think that might be just a hint of tongue showing. Could be kibble. ]

It’s kind of a process, & seems to involve chewing on the cardboard until kibble occurs, then eating kibble until no more is accessible (or until he remembers chewing cardboard is fun), then chewing cardboard for a while. Either way he REALLY enjoys it.

[ The box is entirely missing and so is the lid to the egg carton; Remy appears to be trying to scoop kibble out of one of the little egg cup thingers with his teeth. His muzzle is all wrinkled up and he looks very fierce again. ]

Eventually, there’s no more kibble, no peanut butter, & the cardboard is too chewed up to be worth further effort. Surely now he is tired, & will wish to rest, allowing us respite from his EXTREME PUPPYNESS.

Right?

… right?

[ Remy is standing in his crate, staring directly at the camera, eyes wide, ears perked extremely forward, very intense. ]

Nah.

originally posted on Patreon; support me over there to see posts a week early!

[ Jasper’s standing on his bed, which is basically a wrestling mat on the floor. He’s more-or-less facing the camera, though he’s only visible from the chest down. Remy’s walking behind him, headed to the left, tail caught mid-wag. Jasper’s got a treat in his right hand, encouraging Remy onward. ]

Even on a terrible crappy day when nobody but nobody wants to go outside, you gotta work with your dog (& by ‘you’ I mean ‘people who are training their own service dog’, there’s a reason I have cats y’all).

Anyway Jasper’s been teaching Remy ‘circle’, because that’s a useful thing for a service dog to know. & Remy’s getting pretty good at it.

[ Remy’s making the turn around Jasper’s right side, turning to come around in front of him. He’s a little blurry. Jasper’s still leading him with the hand holding the treat. ]

Also he is VERY EXCITE because he is WITH HIS PAPA & his Papa is GIVING HIM TREATS & because he is being a VERY GOOD BOY!

… indeed, the very goodest. See how good he is at remembering to sit when he’s done doing the thing!

[ Both Jasper and Remy are facing right. Remy’s sitting, like a very good boy, looking up with eager anticipation at the hand holding the treat. ]

“Am I, Papa? Am I the goodest of dogs?”

[ Remy’s sitting to Jasper’s left, now, leash wrapped around Jasper’s legs; he’s just finished another go-round. He’s looking up at his Papa, mouth open in a goofy smile. His ears are sticking out in various directions. ]

“… sure, or you will be, once you’ve put your teeth away.”

[ Remy has put his teeth away. He’s looking up at his Papa, ears relaxed, eyes pitiful. Is he the goodest? ]

“Am I the goodest, Papa?”

“Yes, yes you are.”

“YAY I AM THE GOODEST YAY YAY”

[ Remy’s blurry and so’s Jasper, mostly because Remy’s in the process of jumping up on his Papa. ]

… he’s a work in progress.

originally posted on Patreon; support me over there to see posts a week early!

[ Remy, a big black puppy with white toes, stands holding one end of the brush from a pushbroom in his mouth. It’s maybe a foot and a half long, and the other end almost touches the ground. ]

Remy has a bunch of dog toys. Some of them even started out as dog toys. Some of them? Did not.

[ Remy’s grabbed the brush a bit further down than the end, and is swinging it off to the right. One forepaw has lifted to bat at it. ]

This was an excellent pushbroom for … oh, a good month or two, I think, before it broke, it being really not a very good example of its kind. After which we chucked the pieces into the large pile of other such possibly-useful-but-not-right-now bits, whence they stayed until a much smaller Remy ferreted the brush part out & proceeded to run around with it, extremely pleased with himself.

As well he ought. He has a LOT of fun with the thing.

[ The brush has swung off to the left. Remy’s head is down, but his tail is stuck off to the right, mid-wag. ]

I’ve been meaning to get pictures of this process — & ideally video as well — for a good several months now, the problem being that it is HILARIOUS & thus hard to go get the phone if it’s not already on me. Which it usually isn’t, but since I’d gone outside to get pictures anyway, poof! Remy being an entire dork!

[ The brush is swung way back to the right, more next to Remy than in front of him. His muzzle is wrinkled up in the GRR position. ]

He’s the happiest dog.

[ He’s dropped the brush and is looking down at it. Both ears are flopped forward, and one paw is lifted, as if in surprise. ]

… apparently I wore him out, urging him to ever-dorkier heights so I could get more pictures. Well … he IS a puppy.

originally posted on Patreon; support me over there to see posts a week early!

[ Remy, a big black dog, gazes forlornly out through the windshield. His ears are perked but his eyes are sad. ]

We had to go to Salida, & Remy can always use more practice being in public, so we brought him along.

He had LOTS LOTS OF FUN except for when Jasper hadda go inside without him for five whole minutes.

BUT WHERE HAS MY PAPA GONE.

originally posted on Patreon; support me over there to see posts a week early!

[ Loiosh, an orange tabby, sits neatly in the lower of the two window holes in the new wall of my house. ]

The cats are really enjoying the new wall, because that means it’s easier to get away from the dog.

The dog is really annoyed by it, for much the same reason.

originally posted on Patreon; support me over there to see posts a week early!