yeah so uh

[kellan_the_tabby]

what with one thing & another I haven't posted anything that isn't EXTREMELY public here in a time period, cos it's all been crossposts from the business website

which means there's some personal stuff many of y'all don't know, on account of what if my mom reads my business blog YES I AM A GROWN-ASS ADULT also I'd like to stay in the will thank

so HI my name is Kellan & it turns out I'm a guy

*pauses for shocked reactions*

*waits*

*waits*

... yeah okay fair

I've been on T since June & LET ME TELL YOU I AM SO ANGRY, I knew people running on testosterone built muscle more easily BUT I DID NOT KNOW HOW EASILY like. I work out once & suddenly biceps. I spend a week chopping wood & am suddenly stronk enough to go buy the heavier axe. WHAT THE SHIT, Y'ALL WERE HOLDING OUT ON ME HERE.

also I have gone from 'plausibly deniable upper lip hair' to 'yep that's a fuckin mustache' & have the saddest trans guy soul patch ever

second puberty has been mostly fine except for the [REDACTED] HOLY CATS I WAS NOT READY

I do want my dwarf beard NOW though

gonna try to keep posting stuff like this here because. it's been SO LONG since I wrote about what's actually going on in my life & apparently now is the time to start doing that

I'll probably be changing my username in a couple weeks, I'm thinking kellan-tabby but we'll see

Comments

[ryl]

Congratulations!

[kellan_the_tabby]

Thank!

[siliconshaman]

Conga-rats! Welcome to the Brotherhood of the Beard. (nope, no double entendres here) Hit me up if you need hints what to do with your newly acquired facial hair. (mostly, just let it do it's own thing at first, within reason)

Have fun nodding & grunting at the other guys when lifting heavy stuff. (which describes about 90% of the gym experience as well.)

[kellan_the_tabby]

I'm probably gonna keep it relatively short, at least after I've done the dwarf beard thing at least once. The thought of that level of beard maintenance is a bit much -- I don't even manage to rebraid my hair every morning. Getting out of bed is Quite Enough Thank You.

The gym HAS been fun, although I'm definitely doing too much 'chipper & friendly' & the other guys side-eye me sometimes. Meh, I LIKE being friendly. I also like having biceps.

[siliconshaman]

Yeah... sometimes it takes half the morning to process the Trauma of waking up.

[kellan_the_tabby]

mornings are extremely transphobic, is what

[siliconshaman]

Actually, I think mornings are fairly equal... equally awful for most people!

Now the news that's another matter.

[danabren]

AHAHAHAHAHAHA wheeze love cackle

[umadoshi]

<3 <3 <3

[kellan_the_tabby]

<333 *kermitflail*

[ewt]

Congratulations!

[kellan_the_tabby]

Thank!

Congratulations!

[ysabetwordsmith]

>> so HI my name is Kellan & it turns out I'm a guy <<

I'm glad you've recognized that part of yourself. \o/

>> I do want my dwarf beard NOW though <<

Yeah, I know that feel.

Re: Congratulations!

[kellan_the_tabby]

Thank!

Yeah, so far second puberty is pretty okay, but some days I get pretty impatient.

[mdlbear]

Conga Rats!!

[kellan_the_tabby]

Thank!

[onepageatatime]

Hi, Kellan! Congratulations!

[kellan_the_tabby]

Hi Kristin! Thank!

[labelleizzy]

Congrats, friendo!

[kellan_the_tabby]

Thank!

[cmcmck]

Here via Ysabet and many conga rats.

I headed in the opposite direction in my mid teens many years ago! :o)

[kellan_the_tabby]

*fistbump of trans solidarity*

[montuos]

Kellan. Thank you. Nice name; I like it. I kept not thinking to ask, except when typing was impossible.

[kellan_the_tabby]

I even documented it! Because I am that kind of dork!

[montuos]

Indeed?! (Because I too am that kind of dork.)

[kellan_the_tabby]

& it seems that I managed to NOT WRITE ANY OF IT DOWN. Welp. Good thing I'm not trying to register it, huh.

[kellan_the_tabby]

HA, found it in Woulfe, p.333, 470, 'O Kellan', via Names and Naming Practices in the Red Book of Ormond (Ireland 14th Century) by Tangwystyl

[montuos]

Oops! XD

Oh, good. Because even though it didn't need to be documented, remembering what you looked up and what you found there is important for personal satisfaction.

[kellan_the_tabby]

yessssss

by the looks of things, it might be related to Callahan, & if so, I am EXTRA PLEASED

[chanter1944]

*hugs you* <3 Adding a few conga rats to the dance line!

I take it correct pronouns are he/his, yes? I don't want to goof when referring to you. Also, I confess, I absolutely mentally call you Kyleri all the time, meaning your Igenite greenrider wingleader, and not your previous wallet name. Should I not do that?

[kellan_the_tabby]

He/his, yeah, although they/them isn't wrong, just slightly less right? Gender: tricky!

I think Kyleri is still okay? It doesn't feel like a deadname. It might, who knows, but so far it's fine?

[chanter1944]

*hugs* He/his, so noted. :)

Please do let me know if your Igenite's name ever does stray into unpleasant territory for you. As for the real one, Kellan suits you as a name! I think I'll have an easier time remembering it than your incorrect wallet name, which I was forever forgetting.

[kellan_the_tabby]

I spent SO LONG deciding on a name -- a couple decades, in fact, & the ongoing urge to figure out what I'd call myself were I suddenly a boy MIGHT HAVE BEEN A CLUE -- & I didn't even remember til WELL after I'd settled on Kellan that once upon a time I played a rider called K'lan at, I think, a weyr somewhere on SouCon ...

[thewayne]

Good for you, I hope it all works out well! Fucked up country and times to transition in, I sincerely wish you the best. My youngest niece has done the same thing.

[kellan_the_tabby]

yeah my timing was Not Ideal but welp. Still pretty safe-ish here? So far? I hope?

[el_staplador]

Congratulations!

[kellan_the_tabby]

Thank!

[danabren]

You're still you, so hey, you! Glad you're happier with yourself.

Please don't grow sparse pubes on your chin, you will look like a sad 15 year old boy and that is unacceptable :D

[kellan_the_tabby]

I am totally growing sparse pubes on my chin, that is my MANDATED HORRIBLE TRANS GUY SPARSE CHIN PUBES & I am GUARANTEED THE RIGHT TO THOSE BY THE BROTHERHOOD LAW

(they're not NEAR as bad as they could be, menopause gave me a BIG head start)

[danabren]

I am always embarrassed for the wearer by chin pubes, may yours be manly and lush overnight, worthy of beads.

Dudes don't talk to other dudes if they don't know each other in a strange place that is self-focused i.e. the gym, only grunts, nods, and ookings are permitted. If men chat at strangers at the man gym they are those homer sapiens and we don't cotton to them in these parts.

Be safe <3

[kellan_the_tabby]

I'm at least keeping em trimmed short. Until they have company.

Also YES I will be taking self-defense classes, because anyone who's gonna get all up in my face because I'm being vaguely friendly needs a vigorous punching.

[cellio]

Oh hey, welcome Kellan! I hope you get your dwarf beard soon.

[kellan_the_tabby]

ME TOO (it's gonna be years *sulks*)

but I might get enough mustache to curls the ends before then? maybe? possibly?

[azurelunatic]

Wheeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee congrats!

[kellan_the_tabby]

thaaaaaaaaaaaank