revitalizing chicken
Aug. 2nd, 2017 11:56 am![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
kellan_the_tabby(in the style of Havi's weekly chicken (which you might pronounce check-in but only if you wanted to))
it is wednesday, & we are here
a breath for wednesday, & for all timing is right timing
(oh holy cats i have needed to do this SO SO MUCH)
what works?
half a thing at a time. many deep breaths. (so many deep breaths.) remembering i don't have to do it all now.
next time i might ...
remember sooner that i am not the only one involved in the things
the hard:
worrying SO SO MUCH about Chocolate's tooth thing, i know anesthesia is pretty safe these days even for Very Old Cats, but he is a Very Old Cat, & so i worried (spoilers: he's fine, more later): a breath for what will be is what will be, & for acceptance
friends' house burned down; humans are okay, dog is okay, turtle is okay ... cats are not. they lost their two cats. which is about them NOT ME & so this is not a Hard for me; what is hard is that the house is on fire, i am not home to get the cats out, or (back in the horrible-messy-house days with the Horrible Ex) cannot get to them because there is SO MUCH SHIT all over the place, this is a HORROR to me: a breath for now is not then, & for i do what i can
due to said fire, we were asked to house said friends' 12-year-old kid; Roommate dropped me off at the thing I was doing & headed off to get said kid (with my agreement). I'd been under the impression that she would expedite the errand; she did not, leaving me literally standing in the rain. (Didn't help I'd forgotten my cell phone.) We have VERY different definitions of how important it is to do the thing that you said you would do, as opposed to dealing with things that come up, & honestly I shouldn't have agreed to this. But I felt very abandoned & unimportant at the time. Also, wet: A breath for it's over, we'll talk about it, & next time, cell phone.
the good:
my oldmancat came through the surgery JUST FINE, is MUCH happier without the hurting teeth, is eating kibble again (though still quite happy to get his Magic Gooshyfud). he's FINE. i am SO SO fucking relieved. a breath for my precious boy.
said 12-year-old, of whom we have custody until his parents have got some things figured out & generally dealt with, is a good kid. i like him a lot. having him around is nearly always fun. a breath for good company & being able to provide safety.
the turtle is okay. we also have temporary custody of the turtle, who's in a habitat thag is makeshift but larger than she's used to, with good dirt. she is digging holes & burrows & very happy. a breath for here, in the face of tragedy, is a thing that i can do.
the plan:
small steps. tiny steps. catch up. hold my oldmancat. hold my baby boy. do my deep breathing. ease back into things.
it is wednesday, & we are here
a breath for wednesday, & for all timing is right timing
(oh holy cats i have needed to do this SO SO MUCH)
what works?
half a thing at a time. many deep breaths. (so many deep breaths.) remembering i don't have to do it all now.
next time i might ...
remember sooner that i am not the only one involved in the things
the hard:
worrying SO SO MUCH about Chocolate's tooth thing, i know anesthesia is pretty safe these days even for Very Old Cats, but he is a Very Old Cat, & so i worried (spoilers: he's fine, more later): a breath for what will be is what will be, & for acceptance
friends' house burned down; humans are okay, dog is okay, turtle is okay ... cats are not. they lost their two cats. which is about them NOT ME & so this is not a Hard for me; what is hard is that the house is on fire, i am not home to get the cats out, or (back in the horrible-messy-house days with the Horrible Ex) cannot get to them because there is SO MUCH SHIT all over the place, this is a HORROR to me: a breath for now is not then, & for i do what i can
due to said fire, we were asked to house said friends' 12-year-old kid; Roommate dropped me off at the thing I was doing & headed off to get said kid (with my agreement). I'd been under the impression that she would expedite the errand; she did not, leaving me literally standing in the rain. (Didn't help I'd forgotten my cell phone.) We have VERY different definitions of how important it is to do the thing that you said you would do, as opposed to dealing with things that come up, & honestly I shouldn't have agreed to this. But I felt very abandoned & unimportant at the time. Also, wet: A breath for it's over, we'll talk about it, & next time, cell phone.
the good:
my oldmancat came through the surgery JUST FINE, is MUCH happier without the hurting teeth, is eating kibble again (though still quite happy to get his Magic Gooshyfud). he's FINE. i am SO SO fucking relieved. a breath for my precious boy.
said 12-year-old, of whom we have custody until his parents have got some things figured out & generally dealt with, is a good kid. i like him a lot. having him around is nearly always fun. a breath for good company & being able to provide safety.
the turtle is okay. we also have temporary custody of the turtle, who's in a habitat thag is makeshift but larger than she's used to, with good dirt. she is digging holes & burrows & very happy. a breath for here, in the face of tragedy, is a thing that i can do.
the plan:
small steps. tiny steps. catch up. hold my oldmancat. hold my baby boy. do my deep breathing. ease back into things.
no subject
Date: 2017-08-02 11:10 pm (UTC)Also: while this crisis may not *center* on you, it is OKAY for it to be Hard *for* you. You can ask for help and comfort too. Looked at from roughly your angle, the following Hard Things happened TO YOU: 1. Friends lost home in a fire!!! 2. Cats that you knew that belonged to friends were killed by the fire. This is awful!!! 3. You were acutely reminded of preexisting traumas and fears. 4. You still had to juggle all your regular responsibilities including something scary with your cat. 5. You took custody, however temporarily, of a traumatized kid (and a turtle)! 6. In the process, you were left standing in the rain mid-crisis.
It sounds like you are doing the things you need to do. It's okay to be upset while doing them! You can do this. I know you can do this. But you are allowed to be Not Okay; you're not being Not Okay *at* someone. Remember to have some downtime, and yes, pet your darling cat and love on everyone in ways that make you feel better. Well done. This is good chicken.
So: Can I help somehow???
Frex: What does Kid need that they don't have? I can throw together some things e.g. an extra blanket, a stuffed animal, some books, some; if it's not super expensive I can also order some things, if that is easier than you going and getting it. I could even host a list of items to be collected for you, your household, and your friend's household-to-be-reestablished and keep track of who needs to mail them from where; if this is already happening somewhere, I can participate, or host a smaller focused thing on things likely to be needed in *your* possession for the *use* of Kid. Or: I was just thinking I need a better source for soap. I will buy some soap, and not worry at all about WHEN I get it. And: I can signal boost your e-store if you want, and ask people with wider social networks than me to signal boost.
You are a wonderful shiny person who I am honored to know.
Moments of silences for the feline lives lost.
I love you, friend.
no subject
Date: 2017-08-03 01:47 am (UTC)no subject
Date: 2017-08-03 02:04 am (UTC)no subject
Date: 2017-08-04 08:11 pm (UTC)yeah it's. i just. it's better today.
we still have medium-sized child (also turtle), both seem to be doing all right.
i'll ask my roommate who's keeping track of the Sending of Things. probably the boy could use some books, we don't have a lot of fiction that's not either in boxes or in my Nook (love the kid, he can't have my Nook). clothing has been thrift stored so he's not wearing the same clothes today at least. um.
less was lost than we'd originally thought (which i guess is not atypical?) but the fire was in the kitchen so probably their kitchen stuff is pretty much gone?
i really wouldn't object at ALL to selling you soap & also you spreading the word, that's basically how i get people, i gave up on 'advertising' as such, like, years ago (also check it out, i moved the jewelry to its own site, tricksterstrash.com. i can certainly chuck a lil money from any sales for the next X towards their stuffs.
*clings*
no subject
Date: 2017-08-04 08:29 pm (UTC)Give me a couple of days on the soap; I'm in the process of moving bank accounts...
*MORE hugs* *purring*
no subject
Date: 2017-08-04 09:07 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2017-08-04 09:19 pm (UTC)